I have fluctuated between excited, relieved, and scared as I’ve delved deeper into what it means to be a temple to the Holy Spirit of God. It is really quite intimidating if you think about it.

It’s kind of like having company – ALL THE TIME. I like having company, actually, I love having company. I enjoy the anticipation, the preparation, the actual event, and then the remembering. It is great fun. But what isn’t fun is to have company all the time – even if you love them. Sometimes, you just want to let your hair down, have a PJ day in front of the TV and eat food that’s bad for you – but you never do that in front of company. That’s kind of how one could feel about the Holy Spirit. One like me.

On the one hand – I love it. I love feeling that closeness and connectedness. I love the comfort of feeling like I can trust the Spirit to help me on hard days and guide me when I need to make a decision. I love the idea of worshipping with the Spirit of God – it is a wholly new experience to go take the Spirit of God to church. It’s even helped my parenting and my patience. I don’t think the Spirit appreciates yelling, even if it is at a toddler that has driven me to the brink of madness and STILL won’t do…whatever. Actually, I think the Spirit especially doesn’t like yelling at toddlers. Sigh.

But on the other hand, there have been times when I have started to read something, say something, think something, that is a lot like junk food for the brain. I know there isn’t any value but I so enjoyed it – before. Now it feels like I’ve walked into the living room in my old sweats and my hair ratted from the night before, carrying a tub of Ben & Jerry’s and burping on the way – only to find my new neighbors sitting on my couch ready to visit. Awkward.

So I’ve passed up on a few TV programs, I’ve let a few new books that are all the rage go by, I’ve held my tongue when I wanted to speak. The difference though is that I’m not resenting it. I’m feeling good about it. While I may resent those new neighbors showing up unannounced, I find I’m managing this ‘All The Time Company’ with much more appreciation.

Sure there are times when I want to do something and I think, ‘Ah – it’s not going to hurt anything. It’s not a big deal’ – but it would and it is. It would hurt me and right now God is showing that to me by heightening my sensitivity to the Spirit within me. He is stretching me by leaps and bounds in this area. And the more time I spend being aware of His presence, the less it feels like having company and the more it feels like a marriage. You know the Bible speaks of us as the bride. I love these analogies that help us to understand our relationship.

Bless Greg’s heart – I would have been ok walking out with my Ben & Jerry’s with him on the couch. We are one – he is a part of me. He isn’t company. And so it becomes with the Spirit – a joining and learning. Much like you learn to live with your husband or wife, you learn to live with the Spirit. And in small ways God uses a blessed marriage to help us grow into our ideal selves, so it is with the Spirit in large ways. Iron sharpens iron – the rub of living with Holy Spirit of God will inevitably mold you into a better self.

I manifest a calm spirit because I believe the Spirit within me appreciates an even keel. I straighten my thoughts and try to focus on the beauty of this world, for that is a part of the Spirit and is pleasing. I take care of my health through eating right and exercising because I know that to fail in this area draws my focus inward to my self and away from the Spirit. In all ways I work to honor the Spirit within me. It is hard and I fail often, but the Spirit is full of grace and forgiveness and we start again.

20120808-191355.jpg

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox

Join other followers: