25. May 2012 · 2 comments · Categories: Faith

“The most precious gift you can bring to your lover is your suffering.”
Shantaram : A novel

Confession to God is this – it is bringing to Him your suffering, your sorrow, your shame and your heartbreak. It is handing things over, voluntarily, that you want to keep close to you. It matters not that God already knows these secrets. It matters not that He knew they would happen when time began. What matters is the telling. It is the acknowledgement that He knows – and now He knows because you told Him. It creates intimacy, this telling. It is saying – I not only acknowledge that you know, but I am now standing before you, asking you to know. Asking you to know, and yet, still love me.
And He rewards this breaking each time with a breathless, “Yes. Yes I know and Yes I still love you. Thank you for this beautiful gift you have given me. I treasure this truth between us.”
In return we are provided with healing. Sometimes that one time is enough and we move forward. Sometimes though, we cling to our suffering and bring it to his feet again and again. Broken anew each time. And each time it is the same, “Yes. Yes I know and Yes I still love you. Thank you. I treasure this truth. I treasure you.” A patient Abba comforting and reaasuring us of the same truth moment by moment, day by day, as long as we need.
Suffering is not meant to be carried, it is not meant to be shared. Suffering is meant to be sacrificed. Sacrificed to Love – once, twice, ten thousand times – it will burn every time at the altar of Love. And suffering, properly disposed, feeds Love. Feeds Love until all that is left is Love.
And then one day you will find yourself at the feet of God with only Love to share. You will come with your head held up, your eyes radiant with aniticipation and joy. And God will meet you there with the exact same Love, “Hello. Of course, yes, I know you. I’ve known you all along.”

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